But even in the retreat of words, even in the absence of expression, the throbbing pulse of my thoughts pound me down like a hammer to an iron nail. So here I am, struggling to compose letters into words, words into sentences, and finally, sentences into a sensible set of ideas, obsessions, sadness, and tears.
I’m pretty sure that at the end of this entry, I am still incomprehensible as hell . . . but whatever.
The only reason why I am writing here again is for me to finally unload my obsession over Paramore’s newest album. The truth is, I really have no words for this record, save for the fact that it has been months since its release but the crazy fan girl in me still can’t stop listening to the songs.
Paramore’s After Laughter takes me to a brand new terrain where I can see things more clearly and feel things more strongly. Their new sound resonates a beautiful mess of a music—one which speaks of sadness, but at the same time, celebrates life and forgiveness. Their songs sets to a higher place the heartbreaking beauty of conflicts and reconciliations, and highlights the inevitable human condition upon which these events take place. Their lyrics are so transparent and so true. I have never listened to a record this sincere, this human.
I listen to the tracks and I get lost in my reminiscence. Sometimes, it is hard to swallow the truth that Paramore is the same band I used to listen to ten years ago. Obviously, their line-up has changed, their music has evolved over the years—one record on top of another until it gets harder and harder to recognize the same head-banging underground music that captured my angst-driven youth.
But if you listen close enough, you can hear the same note that sustains Paramore’s brilliant, soul-touching music. The art and the creativity that flows through After Laughter comes from the history that precedes it; from the years of pain and struggle and loss that characterized Paramore’s early music. After Laughter is a celebration of pain and a celebration of life after pain. Suffice it to say that After Laughter is one hell of a festival for every imaginable and unimaginable emotion known to us humans.
And for those who hate, After Laughter is not really an entirely isolated record or a totally different brand of music as much as people say so. But more than that, it is a work of art that is situated right at the heart of Paramore’s evolution and one that is carefully crafted by time.
Okay, turn the music up again.